Sunday, February 8, 2009

Fairwell to Frum Skeptic

Mazal Tov to Frum Skeptic on getting engaged! But not all is well in bloggerland. While FS enjoys her new found happiness, what will become of us? It is an expert opinion that there's a 95% chance that within the next several months Frum Skeptic will undergo an unholy transformation. The One Ring which now encircles her finger is even now using its unholy energies in an attempt to transform Frum Skeptic into Frummie Believer. Listen not to FS's claims that her man is super modern, appearances are deceiving. He is not what he claims he is. He is, in fact, an undercover agent of the Elders of Zion.

The transformation will not happen all at once. It will be gradual, to avoid suspicion. Below are the projected 10 steps that FS will go through before becoming FB.
  1. Turn on privacy settings for her FB account.
  2. Start writing only happy, fluffy posts.
  3. Limit to who can view her FB pictures.
  4. Delete her pictures on FB.
  5. Change her blogger theme and font to be more curly, pink and with more lace.
  6. Delete "not nice" posts on her blog.
  7. Remove all guys from her friends list on FB.
  8. Start using frummie language on her blog.
  9. Close her FB account.
  10. And finally, change her blog name to Frummie Believer.
While there's still hope, it's very slim. Beware, children, lest the same befall you.
P.S. if, when you see her and ask her to see The Ring and she responds with "No! It's mine! My preciousssss", it's already too late.


  1. Dude youve got it wrong.

    Step 1: close FB

    Step 2: write only fluffy post.

    Step 3: comment only fluffiness, and preach it day and night.

    Step 4: Stop Blog altogether.

    step 5: Becomes the stupidest shadchan/Morah around; the exact opposite of what she wants now.

  2. :-)

    With the help of HaKadosh Barachu I will continue on blogging, even with all the wedding planning.

    If I get a headache in the midst of the planning, and am unable to perform my duties as a blogger, I will take an advil and say a perek of tehillim for Hashem to allow me the willpower to blog.

    Oh man!

    ANd you say I'll turn into frummy believer ;)

  3. Well, at least you're not at the "Aibishte" stage yet...

  4. I second everything written here.

  5. punk- you're mean!

    what is this? a conspiracy to tick me off so that I continue to blog because the bloggers tick me off? come on ppl!!!


  6. Mazal tov, frumskeptic! It was a pleasure meeting you some time ago at Moshe's. May you build a bayis ne'eman b'Yisroel with your chosson, and your family should be blessed by Hashem in all ways.

  7. unfortunately, moshe you me right about frum skeptic not posting as much after she gets married, but i dont believe that marriage will change frumskeptic's blogger personality. that kind of thing is the fodder of shadchanim trying to set someone up with a nerdy prospect. when they get married they will surely change. not!!!

  8. Ah, the spam
    your spam has been deleted

  9. Moshe: lol your funny. I can see some of those happening...

    FrumSkeptic: you are so cute :-)