Insanity now, serenity later

Limmud FSU 2012

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 14 May 2012 00:23:00 +0000

This weekend we went to Limmud FSU which was held at Princeton Marriott at Forrestal.
My initial reason for going, I'm a cheap Jew and this event was kosher, Friday to Sunday, $140 per person, kids under 10 free and there was a children's program. Now, while apparently not all Marriotts are created equal and this one had no free internet and a lousy phone reception, there was all you can eat Benny's meat and all you can eat sushi and it don't get better than that. Though the hotel had this cute rustic feel to it.

Some of the lectures I liked, some I didn't and the half assed scheduling was definitely a problem. Mincha was not on the schedule at all, Saturday Shacharit was 1 hour, wtf, on the schedule and Sunday was also 1 hour. And with eating, praying and lecture being at the same time, I missed a few I really wanted to go to. Another damn annoying "feature" was eating in 2 groups, hour each, and getting put, with kids, into second group.

Academy Awards Acting Workshop with Hanoch Gutfreund, which I unfortunately mostly missed because of the Saturday Shacharit and breakfast was actually about meditation and self hypnosis and was very interesting.

Judaism and Homosexuality: Myths and Facts with Jay Michaelson, I almost fell asleep at. I kept waiting for the guy to get to the Judaism part but he kept saying nothing relevant for 40 minutes and seemed to be more knowledgeable in the New Testament than Judaism. And of course used the typical Gay/Liberal agenda of talking only about key points which may support his claim and ignoring everything else. Also had to steal from Shmuley Boteach.

Image of Russian and Russian emigrants in USA with Anna Sergeeva & Lilia Zakirova was seriously a joke. I felt kinda bad for the girls actually as they were up the creek without a paddle, had no idea what they were doing and why and their whole mission seems to be ridiculous and pointless. How to present Russia in a better light to American businessmen. Well, you can't because you can't actually vote out Putin and unlike China, Russia is not stable and not very interested in American money. And they kept trying to imply that America's view of Russia impacts badly on Americans' view of Russian immigrants.

Jewish Eating Habits/Traditions, are they Healthy with Yakov Aidlin. Very animated and funny speaker who presented many interesting points about people's eating habits and obesity. Had a lot of fun listening to this guy.

Kosher Sex with Shmuley Boteach. I don't think anything needs to be said about this lecture. Room was packed like no other lecture and the guy is ROFLMAO every 5 minutes hilarious.

Limmud Gala, featuring Mira Stroika and Iryna Rosenfeld. Well, Iryna's music is not really my type and Mira's only liked one of the songs. Organizers thanked sponsors, talked about Einstein and showed previous of 2 movies. One, looked funny and something I might be interested in watching, depending on the ending. The other's about holocaust and I don't watch tragic movies. The Gala was following by wine tasting and free wine is free wine.

Sunday I tried to make it to the Martial Arts with Alexandr Rosenfeld, which I missed on Saturday because of the shacharit plus breakfast. I managed to only come for the last half hour and was then called in the middle by the mother of one of Shlomo's classmates about a playdate. Did I mention Princeton Marriott has awful reception? In the half hour or less for which I was present, I, ironically, saw application of Upper Block and Outside Middle Block from Tora Dojo used against knife attacks to disarm the opponent.

The last lecture I managed to get to was Head-on! Sculpture Workshop with Grigory Gurevich. Loved it, loved it, loved it! My head, picture included, may have looked like some kind of alien and the workshop should really have been 2 hours instead of a rushed 1 hour, but it was fun. Now I have this 2lb, lopsided clay head which can be used to bludgeon somebody to death.

Leah went to a couple of history lectures which she loved.

Did I enjoy Limmud FSU 2012? Absolutely! Though I hope next time they schedule things better and actually get the presenter's input on how much time and how much space are needed.

And to the Rabbi who woke up early Sunday morning, davened, took all of the siddurim and ran off leaving us without a minyan or siddurim for the scheduled 8am shacharit, you suck.

Make your fridge PUR

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 16:08:00 +0000

For several years I had a Brita pitcher. I got it on sale at Walgreens and at first I liked it, but as time went on, the thing became more and more annoying. It was round, had no cover over the spout and the filters tended to regurgitate pieces of coal into the top reservoir. Looking at Amazon, Brita got their act together and are now making slender pitchers with covered spouts. However, the filters still look the same.

A month ago, I finally got rid of my Brita pitcher and started looking for something better. What I ended up buying was a PUR 18 Cup Dispenser. Ergonomically, this thing is great. It holds 1.125 gallons and is only 5.5" wide (9.75" high and 15" deep). Brita's offering, on the other hand, holds 1.13 gallons and is a whole 9" wide (7.25" high and 14" deep)! I don't know about others, but I don't have room in my fridge for this misshapen monstrosity.

PUR filters, while I'm not qualified to compare effectiveness, are, externally, better designed and better looking than Brita's. While Brita's pale filters dispensed coal, PUR's sexy, blue filters are open only at the very top, keeping the coal from floating out. This more enclosed design, however, in no way hampers the flow of water and no water is left in the top reservoir.

My PUR dispenser stands in the corner of the top shelf of my fridge. It doesn't take up a lot of space and is easy for kids to use. And being in the fridge, keeps the filtered water nice and cold. The only minus is that you can't really put it on the table. Then again, same goes for Brita.

Does PUR filtered water taste better than Brita's? Don't remember. And, living in NYC and supposedly having very high quality tap water, I don't know how well it gets rid of sliminess and whatever other weird qualities of water all you people to the west seem to have.

If you're looking for a filter which won't take up a lot of space in your fridge, and which can hold over a gallon of water, PUR 18 Cup Dispenser is for you.

Pesach Cleaning 2012

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 23:18:00 +0000

Unless you're a crazy chareidi or an even more crazy BT, your main concern before Pesach is the stove, with secondary being the fridge. To add insult to injury, my stove has small pipes all over and is hard to clean.

Today, Nicole Levine from Home Clean Home, sent over two guys who are outright homicidal when it comes to chometz and dirt. While I only asked them to clean the stove and fridge, within only two hours they managed to not only make the fridge and stove look brand new, they cleaned the window, window sill and cabinet doors until they shined. They didn't just do a good job, they did a damn good job. And then they also put all the food back in the fridge.

The job was done fast and well and no micro-management was required. If you want a clean home for Pesach, get Home Clean Home.

Mystery Manor - Zodiac - Bedroom

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Wed, 21 Mar 2012 05:04:00 +0000

UPDATED: 03/25/2012

♈ Aries: x2
♉ Taurus: x2
♊ Gemini: x1
♋ Cancer: x2
♌ Leo: x2
♍ Virgo: x2
♎ Libra: x2
♏ Scorpio: x2
♐ Sagittarius: x1
♑ Capricorn: x1
♒ Aquarius: x2
♓ Pisces: x1

Mystery Manor - Zodiac - Living Room

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 04:22:00 +0000

UPDATED: 3/19/12

Моя Азбука в стихах

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 18:04:00 +0000

Моя Азбука это азбука в стихах для маленьких читателей.

Сделайте подарок,
Вашему ребёнку.
Дочке или сыну,
Внучке иль внучонку.

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 02:48:00 +0000

Healthy.
Cheap.
Will not increase your dread of Pesach cleaning.
Can be enjoyed by both, kids and adults.
Easy to unwrap.

It's raining Katz, Hallelujah!

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 15:00:00 +0000

I'm a host on shabbat.com with my status set to always available. This shabbat, I had the chance to participate in a comedy of errors you usually only see in a movie.

Thursday evening, I received a message from shabbat.com that a Joe Katz was requesting to come for Friday or Saturday meal, with his kallah. Now maybe I had a brain fart, but I decided that kallah could also mean that they've been married for a few months, not just engaged. I replied that I have room for the Friday meal.

Several hours later, I received a message that a Rivkah Katz was requesting to come for the Friday night meal. Now I just accepted Joe for Friday and here's a girl, with the same last name, sending request for the same meal. I've had people who were coming together, send separate requests so I just assumed that this is Joe's kallah and she's sending a separate request because they have separate accounts and is doing it so that shabbat.com shows the correct total guests. I clicked accept and put the matter out of my mind.

Fast forward to Friday night, all the guests are here and Joe introduces his fiancée as Hanna. So they're not yet married but girls do like to be cute and change their names on social websites before the marriage. Wasn't her name something else? Though I did have people come over who use a different name on shabbat.com so this didn't raise much of a flag either.

It's now the middle of the fish course and there's a knock on the door. Both grandmas are here, all 3 sets of guests are here, who can this be? I open the door and there's a girl there who starts apologizing for being late and that the door downstairs was closed and the only thing that's going through my mind at this moment is "Who are you?". I wonder if I had that deer in the headlights look when I opened the door. Well, you don't look like a serial killer so do come in.

Turns out these were completely different people, not related to each, not even from the same country, who had the same last name and decided to send a request for the same meal, one after the other. Food and space were definitely not a problem as I'm not one of those people who cooks for the exact number of guests. In fact, I tend to expect friends to suddenly call me at any time on Friday and ask if they could come over or even pick up extra guests in shul.

This is definitely the most entertaining set of coincidences that I've had the pleasure to experience. And as long as I'm the only one who got freaked out, no harm, no foul. And thank you to all the Katzs and not yet Katzs for coming over and making it a fun meal.

Полис

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 00:29:00 +0000

Станции:

Александровский Сад
Арбатская
Библиотека имени Ленина
Боровицкая

Достопримечательности:

Культурная и духованая столица метрополитена.
Брамины (Хранители книг)
Кшатрии (Военные)
Совет Полиса
Сталкеры
Место жительства Мельника.
Место жительства художников, музыкантов и писателей.
Второе по богатству, после Ганзы, сообщество в метро.

Опасности:

С Александровского Сада, перегон к станциям Четвёртого Рейха (Фашисты)
Перегон Боровицкая - Полянка - Добрынская (Ментальная Угроза?)

Chamah Shabbaton

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 20 Feb 2012 01:58:00 +0000

We finally made it to Chamah Shabbaton at Stamford Plaza Hotel in Stamford, CT. Though we overpaid by $100 because of late registration. In general, we liked the shabbaton and will go next year too.

First, let's get the bitching out of the way. The Kensigton/Midwood bus for people without cars leaves from a location not very accessible without a car. The children's programs are not very organized, start late, and 3 year olds are stuck between babysitting and a 4-7 group. Shabbat davening is horribly slow, includes long aliyah sale and is in a badly ventilated room. Food at melav malka was not served until 11pm and this is having in mind that most people are there with kids.

However, there is a children's program, which is great for older children and they even eat separately and are served more kid friendly food. There is a pool with separate hours and a gym. Stamford Plaza has complimentary wifi and cable, with a big screen TV. Within a mile of the hotel, there is a mikvah and 2 minutes away there is a shopping center which has children's clothes, food, beer, and baby needs.

Things to have in mind when registering and packing:

Each room has a large bed with a single frame but separate mattresses. There's also a fold out couch.
Each room comes with an iron (no ironing board), a large screen TV with free cable and a small coffee machine with complimentary coffee.
You can request a fridge through Chamah at a discount rate of $15/night.
There are 4 elevators, 2 of which are switched to shabbos mode on shabbos.
2 minutes away, literally 2 minutes away, is a shopping center. Exit from main entrance and walk left 1 block.
There are 2 children's clothing stores, including Children's Place.
There's a CVS.
There's a supermarket, Stop & Shop, which has a kosher aisle, baby supplies and beer. Walk past Staples and use the stairs on the other side of the road to reach it.
Use FourSquare and KosherGPS apps to discover places around the hotel.

SSL is for goyim

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 16:29:00 +0000

Following Pomegranate's example, they were smart enough to take the form down, Mountain Fruit now has an online order form, with a credit card section, all being submitted without SSL.
I'm guessing that they decided that SSL is a goyish meshugas and that all you need is faith in Hashem who will personally protect their customers' credit cards.
Now, I'm guessing that besides the lack of SSL, all of the credit card information is either being emailed to someone or stored, unencrypted, in an easily accessible database.
On the other hand, someone stupid enough to submit credit card info online without taking the bother to notice whether the page is secure or not, deserves what they get.

I emailed Mountain Fruit regarding the "oversite" at 11:16am, let's see what happens next.

Содружество ВДНХ

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 13:34:00 +0000

Станции:

ВДНХ
Алексеевская
Рижская

Достопримечательности:

Лучший грибной чай во всём метро.
Место жительства Артёма.

Опасности:

Чёрные (Биологическая Угроза)
Перегон между Алексеевской и Рижской (Ментальная Угроза)

Winter Vacation 2012

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 02:07:00 +0000

Today was day 2 of the kids "winter vacation" and I was planning on going with the kids and Barb to Sony's Wonder Technology Lab. It's a good thing we met the local PA Nachum Weingarten (he's across the street from Glatt Mart, 718-627-0213), who was heading to Times Square with his family and told me that the museum is probably closed. Apparently most, if not all, museums are closed every Monday.

Barb suggested going to the Time Square Toys R Us and that's where we went. Turned out the PA was heading this way too. Kids went on, and very much enjoyed, the Ferris Wheel. When Shlomik was on the Ferris Wheel, he noticed the live size animatronic dinosaur on the second floor. Shlomik, together with Barb, ran to the dinosaur. Even though he thought it was real, he walked up to it and petted it. Nochum wanted to see it too, at least when he saw it from the Ferris Wheel. A few feet from the elevator, when he got a closer look, he decided the dinosaur wants to eat him as he was literally terrified for his life and was hiding behind me and dragging me the other way. Picking him up did not help at all. When it was time to leave, I actually had to drag him to the elevator as he didn't want to go anywhere even remotely near the dinosaur. Wasn't bothered watching this clip at home though. Kids played around with some of the toys and almost wrecked the build your own robot display. I wouldn't buy any of the toys there though, only online, specifically because other kids have played with them, drained the batteries and grabbed everything with dirty hands. I was, however, very tempted to buy the robot starter set.

We were near the two kosher street vendors and I was really hoping one of them would have a corn dog, something I've only seen on TV. The first one had falafel and salads and I really don't understand what the point of vegetarian meat balls is. The second was not where it was supposed to be so we went home.

We went home on the B. Cutesy of the MTA, I completely forgot that B runs on the Q line in Brooklyn. Good thing Barb was there to remind me. There was a seriously weird ad on the train for LIM college. Not sure what this face expression is supposed to be. Is she yawning? Yelling? Growling? Having a seizure?

We parted with Barb on Newkirk. Now here's the setup. I put the stroller in the middle of the platform, away from both sides. I'm standing right in front of the stroller and facing the kids. Nochum is in the stroller, Shlomik next to him and I'm telling them, albeit in Russian, to behave. Then, while still standing right next to the stroller, facing the kids and keeping an eye on them, I decide to check in on foursquare. Well, this jackass who was on the platform since we got off decided to tell me what a bad parent I am. Told me that instead of playing with my phone, checking stocks, I should be paying attention to what my kids are doing and that they should be taken away. ORLY? Told him to keep his mouth shut and mind his business and took a pic of his VIP self. Told him this will be online tonight and here it is.

Thanks goes to Barb for being the tour guide and helping with the kids.

Still want to take the kids to the Sony museum and about time to visit the MTA museum again. But, Sundays are crowded and Pesach probably too.

SOPA

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 14:17:00 +0000

With #SOPA : Everything ███ █████ is█████ ████ fine ████ ███ ██████ love █████ █ your █ ████ government

QR Borg Cube

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 19:42:00 +0000

Assimilate this!

The Borg are here and they want you to spread their message to your collective.
Are you man enough to join the machines?
Enlist now and you too can have your own personal shield generator, and be able to heal and regenerate.

Never be alone again!

Long live the queen!

Foursquare troll

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 02:37:00 +0000

Have started using foursquare and within a month, someone is already ruining the fun for me. Have managed to get four mayorships and, as part of normal use, have ousted what turned out to be a foursquare troll. A certain Steef J, aka Steef Jacobson, aka Stephen Steef Jacobson has decided that only he is allowed to be mayor and, after spamming checkins at the venue from which I ousted him, started going after all other venues where I have ever checked in to remove me from mayorship and/or prevent me from becoming a mayor. How do I know this? I accepted his friend request and have noticed that he's even checking in at my shul and my son's day care and doing it several times per day and when the venues are closed.
Have now defriended and reported him for abuse to foursquare. Hope they disable his account as he seems to be going after other people too.

Checking in at multiple locations at the same time and thanks to twitter can track his obnoxious behavior:
https://twitter.com/#!/_steef_

And here he is on foursquare:
https://foursquare.com/_steef_
A Jewish, religious, guy is a mayor at a church? Really?

And he's on facebook too:
https://www.facebook.com/steef.jacobson

Using foursquare? Make sure you don't friend this psycho, or same can happen to you.

UPDATE - 12/19
This guy seems to be doing this to other people to as he's checking in at 4 to 8 different location, within seconds of each checkin and doing this several times per day. If Steef is harassing you too, email privacy@foursquare.com, give them his username, _steef_ and your username or id and let them know that he's spamming fake checkin in order to remove/prevent you from becoming a mayor.

Excel - Concatenate range

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 22:40:00 +0000

Not as pretty as a custom function, but gets the job done.
To concatenate all values in range A2:A100, place the following formula into B2 and drag/fill it down to B100.

=CONCATENATE(B1,",",A2)

If you want to concatenate all values in a range on the condition that there's a 1 in column B:

=IF(B2=1,CONCATENATE(C1,",",A2),C1)

To avoid the , or 0 at the beginning, in the first cell that should have a value, enter the value manually and copy the formula to the cell below it.

Mystery Manor - Cloakroom

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 03:48:00 +0000

Mystery Manor - Bathroom

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 03:33:00 +0000

Angel - Top left.
Apple - Middle of mirror.
Ball - Inside alcove.
Bell - Bottom of cart.
Candlestick - Bottom left of bathtub.
Champagne - Above cart, on left.
Clock - On top of cart.
Detergent - Behind cart.
Fire Alarm - Ceiling above bathtub.
Duck - Left of mirror.
Gear - Inside alcove.
Glove - Bottom right.
Linen Basket - Behind cart.
Perfume - Wall left of bathtub.
Plunger - Ceiling above cart.
Scale - Bottom left.
Seahorse - Ceiling above bathtub.
Shell - Left corner of bathtub.
Ship - Bottom center.
Small Broom - Bottom left.
Vase - Front table.
Wine Glass - Bottom left of bathtub.
Woman's Shoe - Bottom left.
Wrench - Above bathtub.

Mystery Manor - African Room

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 03:06:00 +0000

African Diamond - Floor, right.
African Elephant - Top right wall.
African Mask - Right side of hut.
African Scorpion - Roof, bottom right.
Basket - Right of roof.
Bananas - Held by monkeys.
Butterfly - Right wall, center.
Crocodile Skull - In hut in fire.
Cup - On drum, front center.
Feather - On spear, right of hut.
Goggles - Right wall, bottom right.
Gun - In vase, left of hut.
Knife - Stuck in drum, floor, right.
Pineapple - In hut on table.
Pith Helmet - Floor, right.
Rhino - Left window.
Shaman Amulet - Right of roof.
Shaman Potion - On drum, front center.
Shell - Top of roof.

Inserted Evil Clue 5

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 00:55:00 +0000

Tune in
Lock and load
Check out the inventory

Add Jewish Holidays to Google Calendar

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Tue, 27 Sep 2011 01:10:00 +0000

Here's how to add Jewish Holidays to Google Calendar:
In left column, click on the down arrow, right of Other Calendars.
Select Browse Interesting Calendars.
Scroll down to Jewish Holidays and click subscribe.

To add Jewish dates, in Interesting Calendars, click the More tab and subscribe to Hebrew Calendar.

Simanim

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 00:32:00 +0000

This is a repost from last year.

Our shul follows the kabbalistic version of the order in which the simanim are eaten on Rosh Hashanah. It makes more sense halachakli too, why would you eat an apple before a date. The order is taken from Rabbi Yaakov Chaim Sofer's book Kaf Hachaim.

First, the brochot are made, haetz on the dates and haodama on the leek.

After the brochot, the order is the following:

Silka (beets) - Sheyistalku oyveinu umastineinu.
Karti (leeks) - Sheyikartu soneinu.
Temarim (dates) - Sheyitamu soneinu.
Kra (yellow squash) - Sheyikoru roa gzar dineinu, vayikoru lefoneiha zehuyoseinu.
Rubiya (black-eyed peas) - Sheyirbu zehuyoseinu.
Rimonim (pomegranates) - Shenarbe zehus k'rimon.
Rosh Keves (head of sheep) - Shenihye l'rosh v'lo l'zonav.

Yellow squash can be eaten raw. You can buy black-eyed peas in Glatt Mart and probably in Pomegranate and Mountain Fruit, look for Eden Foods.
Best looking lamb's head is in Avi Glatt. Though this year it looks kinda meh too, not full half of head.

Shana Tova!

FaceBook games filter for the new news feed - 09/2011

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 19:33:00 +0000

Can't make heads or tails of the new FaceBook news feed which now has everything in it and seemingly no filter?
Here are the links:
CityVille
CafeWorld

For other games, get the ID by going to the game, scrolling all the way down and getting the ID from one of the links at the bottom.

I got a 101 on my CS test!

noreply@blogger.com (Moshe Ruzin) — Tue, 20 Sep 2011 02:26:00 +0000

Binarily Graded
If you're 1 of the 10 people who understand binary, you should know that a 100 on a CS test is nothing to brag about. What you should really aspire for is a 101.

Don't be satisfied with a B, you know you could do better!